Perfect Impact Reporting from Lockdown 2009

So we just finished watching Lockdown Live in Philly.

Off the top off my head I can say that the Team 3D match was almost like watching old ECW Dudlet Boys matches. I didn't get fire....but that mattered very little. The match was a brawl but great for getting the crowd into it....

The X-Division match was pretty cool....the IWGP JR Tag Title match was impressive....and Foley winning the title was pretty cool. Especially when Team 3D came out to congratulate him....I'm standing about 30 feet from Team 3D right now.

All in all it was a better than Wrestlemania.

More from the rest of the group later....

Perfect Impact Predictions for Lockdown

Ok, Rich Colin and Diabolik are all at Lockdown Live in Philly. And now Diabolik has caught up with all of the TNA Impacts he was behind on so we are going to call out predictions for the show.

IWGP Junior Tag Titles:
Colin: LAX
Rich: No Limit
Diabolik: Motorcity Machine Guns

Knockout Title:
Colin: Awesome Kong
Rich: Awesome Kong
Diabolik: Who the fuck cares?

X-Division Title:
Colin: Suicide
Rich: Suicide
Diabolik: Suicide

TNA / IWGP Tag Team Titles:
Colin: Team 3D
Rich: Team 3D
Diabolik: I want 3D but I think Beer Money Inc

Lethal Lockdown:
Colin: Team Jarrett
Rich: Main Event Mafia
Diabolik: Main Event Mafia

World Heavyweight Title:
Colin: Foley
Rich: Foley
Diabolik: I want Foley but I think Sting

We'll see what happens...

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up T-Minus 1 Hour!

Watching the Impact that aired on Thursday....

Spike Dudley and Balls Mahoney are at the Impact Zone....Why?!?!?!? They showed up to wish Team 3D luck at Lockdown....they had an indy show in the area....

Foley interviewing Cactus Jack is fucking amazing.....Cactus is pissed off at Foley for being lazy....Sting comes out....Sting wants to know if this is an act....MEM music hits and Foley attacks Sting....and he starts asking for random entrance music....

Spike and Balls are attacked by Beer Money.....Team 3D comes in after Balls and Spike are busted open.....they call out Beer Money....they are calling for a Philly Street Fight.....

Angle is out for the main event against a mystery opponent who is.....CHRISTOPHER DANIELS!!! And Daniels beats Angle....but Angle wants a different decision because his shoulder was up....and Jarrett does...

Next up is Lockdown....and my predictions....I DID IT!

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up T-Minus 2 Hours...

Watching April 9's Impact....

Sting calls out Jarrett....he wants to know why Foley was allowed to book a match between Joe and Sting.....Jarrett is the one "calling the shots" in TNA.....Sting wants a warm up match for Foley tonight.....Motorcity Machine Guns come out to the ring....Shelley calling out the fact that Foley is in charge....Shelley wants the MMG against Foley for a handicap match as a warm up for Lockdown.....

JB is with Foley....Foley is proud of the fact that Jarrett is taking the reins of the companys again....Foley says he is going to tweak the match....

A Jeff Jarrett DVD....hmmmm....not so much....

Don West is still heel marking....ironically he is talking about people discriminating against Bashir and then says that with Bashir's background he could snap....Bashir pins Suicide after a DDT on the X-Division title....

I love the blood effect on the cage in the video for Lockdown....

Rhino is offering to train the Petty Officer that came down at Destination X to become a wrestler....

The Rough Cuts with Team 3D have been pretty cool....I like shoot interviews normally and this is an interesting take on it...

Foley's tweak on the match is a First Blood Match with Sting as the special guest enforcers...and Jarrett at ringside for some reason...."Have a nice evening"??? Did he get hit with a lawsuit for the Have a Nice Day thing?

Booker talks about Sharmel being taken by Joe....

Joe's tattoo isn't real??? Damn....I guess Steiner wasn't lying about the facepaint...

The governor is Daffeney???? Cool.....

WHY ARE WE WASTING MORE FUCKING TIME ON THIS STUPID ODB DATE THING?!?!?!?!

MMG is offering to put up the IWGP Junior Tag Titles against Foley.....

Nash interferes in a match involving Beer Money and Steiner and Team 3D comes in to protect them....

Foley vs MMG....first blood match....Ref tries to stop the match because of some blood on Mr. Socko....Foley wants to bust someone open.....Sting hits Foley with a chair....which busts Foley open and the MMG win....Foley and Sting go at it....

One more episode....2 hours....I might actually get this done on the drive to the arena...

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up T-Minus 4:30

Part 2 from March 26....

Foley 'thought' he was protecting the life of Jarrett when he saw Sting with the guitar...lol....does this mean Foley is not doing Hardcore History anymore? :-(

So the Lethal Lockdown Captain's Gauntlet match results in Angle and Samoa Joe being captains and Joe's team wins the advantage.....so I was right that it was going to be Frontline vs MEM....

Don West is such a fucking MEM mark.....

3 more episodes left with 4.5 hours before Lockdown....

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up T-Minus 4:50

March 26 Impact.....

Best start ever....announcing that the title is on the line for Sting vs Foley.....not that I think Foley will win....just having it on the line is amazing....

Then announcing the Lethal Lockdown match being With the team captains being determined by a cage gauntlet match.....interesting.....though I'm 90% sure it will end up with The Frontline vs The Main Event Mafia.....especially since a large majority of the MEM is in the gauntlet......and why is Angle calling everyone jabronis? So it's going to be Angle and Jarrett as the captains since Jarrett is going to be in the match.....

Why is that Survivor winner in TNA? I still haven't gotten an answer....

You know people were chanting Fallen Angel for Suicide at Destination X.....I wonder....maybe I was wrong about it being Kaz? The match with Kiyoshi was really good....

The video package for Lockdown is amazing and showcases the talents of the TNA production team....

A little Tazz reference from Team 3D.....

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up T-Minus 2:50

Yep....another episode....Watching April 2 right now.....

Joe doesn't want to be the captain of the team....AJ is asked to take the reins and he says no...he says that Jarrett should be the captain....Steiner comes to the ring and starts talking about his personal relationship with Jarrett.....trying to recruit Jarrett into the Mafia....

Team 3D being challenged by the MEM security....lol....

The Foley interview with Tenay was briliant....losing his mind is always a great angle....

Yay! Another Dr. Stevie segment....A fucking I'll Show You reference!!!!!!!! All I needed was a "You'll See!" and I think I would have fucking passed out....BRILLIANT!

Team 3D beats the MEM Security and then get beat down....Beer Money comes in and saves them in an odd sense of honor and respect....I actually have more respect for them now....

MEM is in the ring and Foley is in the rafters with a barbed wire baseball bat....and he booked a match for Sting (non-title) against Samoa Joe....

I get another Dr. Stevie segment....with the Governor???

I love the video package for Lockdown...it has Christian taking so much abuse....

Maybe I will get an answer as to why there is a Survivor winner.....Nash shows up...talks to her sexy...I guess there is consideration for her investing into TNA....whatever....

The fact that watching Samoa Joe wrestle the way he is now gives me goosebumps is awesome....I don't know why it happens, but it does.....I think the irony of there being a Nation of Violence where Joe is the only member is really funny....why is a steel chair the weapon of choice for wrestlers?.....Joe takes Sharmel out of the arena.....and the episode ends.....

2 Episodes left...2 hours and 50 minutes to watch them in.....

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up T-Minus 5:40

My phone's email has a character limit....I didn't realize I typed that much.....Still on March 19

Samoa Joe has Bashir hanging from his feet and tells him to go back to where he comes from....HE'S FROM AMERICA....WHY DON'T PEOPLE GET THAT???? Joe beats on him with a Kendo Stick....

Gee a ref bump in the main event.....Foley chair shots Sting for the pin....I think Sting got hit harder than I thought since he thinks he got hit in the back of the head....Sting challenges Mick at Lockdown....for the title maybe???? Foley gives the best promos......Getting a little mankind on us there.....I can only hope it's for the title.....That would be great.....

Well 8 hours/4 episodes left to watch in 5 hours and 40 minutes.....

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up T-Minus 6 hours

I was asked to have breakfast with Danae and Keith so i lost another hour....I will get this done....March 19 on deck.....

So we get Angle and Sting vs Jarrett and Foley.....ok.....

The Motorcity Machine Guns are the IWGP Junior champs....interesting.....the match between MMG and No Limit was really good.....

Beer Money Inc vs Team 3D for the TNA and the IWGP tag tean titles at lockdown....even more interesting.....

Angle is retardedly paranoid....it is a good angle....

Is there a good reason for why Samoa Joe is facing Bashir? Not that I mind him beating on Bashir...just doesn't make sense.....

Why do the Beautiful People get so much airtime?

At least they addressed the fact that the Legends Title was fake but Booker allowed it to be defended and lost....Booker is still unintelligible...and Styles points that out.....

Why is Don West a Main Event Mafia mark?

Why is she still called the Governer? Why do I care?

Part 2 coming since my phone email has a character limit.....

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up T-Minus 8 Hours

Just finished watching Destination X.....

Styles wins the Legends Title from Booker.....

Ultimate X match was great as it should be....with Suicide winning the title....

Angle vs Sting was ok. A little clusterfuckey, but a decent match. Of course Angle blames Jarrett and Foley for losing....

Samoa Joe limping away saying he scarred Steiner was actually ominous.

On to the next Impact....

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up T-Minus 16 Hours

It's 4am and I just turned on Destination X....Which means 13 hours of programming to watch in 16ish hours....its gonna be a marathon....

Beautiful People vs other people....who cares....

Matt Morgan vs Abyss.....must have sucked to lay in those tacks for that long Abyss.....

WHY THE FUCK AM I WATCHING A DANCE OFF ON A PPV????

Dear God...JB needs a new job....

Are you fucking kidding me....15 minutes of this bullshit....

Gee what a shocker...Kong won....

Don has kind of dropped the heel angle for the time being....

Samoa Joe vs Steiner....holy shit Joe looks so vicious....

I'm about half way through Destination X when AJ Styles and Booker are going to have a match....but I am falling asleep so I think it is time to pause and come back after some sleep....

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up T-Minus 17:20

Still catching up.....March 12, 2009

Sting gets to pick someone and Angle gets to pick someone and they fight.....fun....of course there will be chaos....whatever....

Why is there a Survivor winner on TNA....they tried that on fucking WWE....

Don West started out not at the announce table and now he has joined it....still as a heel....

Gee...we go from The Beautiful People to My Pi Sexy?? I don't even care how to spell it....Holler...

Now I can get behind doing these montages of wrestlers during the show....but why aren't they showcasing the guy who just wrestled at the end of the next segment....

I love fast forward....since I watched episode after episode so I don't really need to watch the recaps.....

Cornette goading Booker into a match with Styles was well written...

Angle with a if you don't understand English don't come to the country....

The fact that Tenay and West keep referencing the fact that Tenay thinks people should take it to the ring and leave it in the ring makes me think that they are going to be fighting....

A talking Abyss is pretty fun to deal with....I wonder why they always gave him a handler....

Mick Foley at the announcers table because Don West walked out again....lol....

I literally laughed out loud when ODB mounted JB.....

Somehow I sincerely doubt that Foley would get laid out by a steel pipe if the man can fall off a table through a damn table....but that's the game they want to play...

You know Booker talking normal still doesn't make him any easier to understand.....

I've decided that I am going to get TNA Mobile now that it is free and once I am caught up.....

Once again....they are showing us the LAX montage video after they have finished wrestling and a whole other segment has finished.....

heh...."Rocco" from MEM security is recruited by Angle for this pick your avatar match because Angle can't get anyone else to represent him.....I could totally replace Rocco....I weight the same as him and I am bigger...

I have to get behind the fact that if Sting wins he is going to be taking over the MEM and not leaving the MEM.....it would make a better swerve....Sting could have sent "the hit" to take out Mick to make it look like it was Kurt....

Hmmm....Double J as the Guest Ref and Foley as Enforcer.....interesting.....I think that is where Sting is going to swerve and tell everyone that Jeff and Mick are working for him.....

Next up...Destination X.....13 hours left.....

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up T-Minus 21:30 Hours

Ok, I have 17 Hours of TNA to watch with 21:30 left before Lockdown starts.

I haven't had a whole hell of a lot of time to watch TNA between school and such.

Things to note: Don West losing it on Tenay was cool. Especially since they were discussing letting him go form the company. Though I don't know who would replace him, but that matters very little to me unless it is Michael Cole.

Angle vs Sting in the empty arena was....odd. I mean it apparently got huge ratings, but it wasn't that great. It was a little different, but that was about it. I love the fact that they are fucking with the MEM while they are still a fairly fresh faction. It makes it seem like they aren't too invested in the outcome of it.

Joe showing up with a knife at Steiner's throat was fun. I also think it is funny that they have only been showing his profile that doesn't have the tattoo.

Suicide wanting the X-Division title is interesting.....He moves a lot like Kaz....maybe....

I love the recaps of Ultimate X matches.

And Foley having the Hardcore Rememberings is great.....makes me want to go find some of the things that he is talking about.....

Dan West being a heel is kind of cool.....

Petey Williams losing the Beer Money match and being let go was disappointing. I hope that he is moving on to something else like ROH or something.....

I didn't care about Lance Rock....

The mini interviews with the rasslers is cool....

James Storm slapping Roode in the ass and then coming back to slap Jackie was funny....

Booker losing the stupid accent is great.....

The Spend the Night with ODB contest is weird.....and creepy.....

I think the MEM track suits is stupid....them coming out in suits was cool.....

There is so much talking now in TNA....I remember when there was like 5 minutes of talking and tons of wrestling....why when they switched to 100% more television time did they switch to 350% more talking?

I just saw a sign saying "Bring Back Sabu".....

I hope that we get a Don West vs Mike Tenay match in the future.....

The Nation Of Violence idea is pretty cool.....

Arresting Styles.....hmmmm.....and then Don trying to sell it as serious is silly....though Tenay saying that you should settle these things in the ring...that is funny....I always wondered how wrestling organizations put over the fact that the wrestlers were willing to forego assault charges just to get in a ring with they guy who assaulted them.....

Oh yeah....the Dr. Stevie segments are great.....I hope that Dr. Stevie turns out to be Stevie Richards.....that would be cool.....

I think it is funny that Cornette took back the title belt from Booker T...the 'rightful holder' of a fake championship that TNA has decided to honor......

The fact that Beer Money Inc is playing stupid is pretty funny.....they actually almost thought that Team 3D was referring to some other tag team besides them.....

That was mostly from March 5......

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up: Against All Odds 2009

So Mobile blogging sucks....I gotta figure out a better solution...

So the first 3 hours of my last 24 is Against All Odds. Here goes.....

So Petey Williams vs Scott Steiner....how can they justify not letting Williams actually fight someone he can properly showcase his talents against?

Steiner hits a Steiner Screwdriver ..... Who thought it was a good idea to let Steiner potentially cripple Petey?

So AJ Styles is back....I barely noticed he was gone.....

How did Matt Morgan have a streph infection in his shoulder?

Ok, the four way match for the Heavyweight Title was pretty bad. Sting wins with a Scorpion Death Drop on Bubba Ray that had a horrible set up.

Diabolik's TNA Catch-Up that was from Twitter

My Loudtwitter shipping isn't working again. So here is everything from the last 2 days I have been Twittering. I have 24 Hours of TNA programming left...2 PPVs and 9 Impacts to go....

1. The Allex Shelly vs Chris Sabin match at TNAs Genesis is fucking amazing.....2:58 AM Apr 14th from txt

2. What's up with JB's new look? 3:09 AM Apr 14th from txt

3. Jackie in a suit is such a damn good idea.....she looks so much better than the redneck whore she was before. 3:17 AM Apr 14th from txt

4. Once I am done with Genesis I have 16 shows left before Sunday. Jesus. So much wrestling. 3:24 AM Apr 14th from txt

5. For the record, Jarrett did not get either of his shoulders up after the Angle Slam because his shoulder blades were down. 3:28 AM Apr 14th from txt

6. That was such a bad roll through to give Angle the win I almost think it was genuine. 3:30 AM Apr 14th from txt

7. Lol. A 6 way count-out. How could Cornette not have the authority to restart a match if he is the commish? *Shrug*3:48 AM Apr 14th from txt

8. I want a flaming tack glass table. . . . . and of course I don't get it. 3:50 AM Apr 14th from txt

9. Wow what a shocker. . . . Mick Foley gets the pin. . . At least he pinned Steiner. . . . and now I am going to try to sleep. More wrestling tomorrow. 3:53 AM Apr 14th from txt

10. Watching the TNA Impact from January 15. . . . curtain jerking a Heavyweight Title Match?12:37 PM Apr 14th from txt

11. I forgot I was right in front of a computer. . . . . easier to type here. . . . 12:44 PM Apr 14th from web

12. Trying to recreate the NWO is a bad idea. . . did TNA need a "heel" faction to get everyone to rally against?12:46 PM Apr 14th from web

13. Well yeah of course it helps. . . . but this is the NWO, tactics and all. . . . just not as original. . . . 12:47 PM Apr 14th from web

14. So Kip is back to being "Cute Kip". . . . fun. . . . 1:39 PM Apr 14th from web

15. Ok, watching the January 29 Impact and the fact that Main Event Mafia has taken over is brilliant. 1:51 AM Apr 15th from txt

16. Booker and Nash commentating is a beautiful thing. Steiner as the ring announcer is funny. 1:52 AM Apr 15th from txt

17. Crap. The best part of the whole episode was the commentary. I'd rather listen to Booker as Black Snow than Don West (or Michael Cole)about 23 hours ago from txt

18. So it went from great entertainment to talking about tough cowboys. . . . with just a little cameo from James Storm. . . :-( about 23 hours ago from txt

19. I think it is sad that now I am speeding through the rest of the show. . . . I would be listening to every word from Chet Lemon and Black Snow. about 23 hours ago from txt

20. I wonder if the new tattoo on Joe is real or not. . . . 90% sure it is real. . . . about 14 hours ago from Mobile Tweete

21. Whittling it down bit by bit. Now watching February 5th's Impact. . . . about 14 hours ago from Mobile Tweete

22. Umm. . . why would SoJo care if JB was in the room if she wanted to mess with Cornette. . . . about 13 hours ago from Mobile Tweete

23. Booker is acting more like Chris Tucker in 5th Element. . . . wacky. . . . about 13 hours ago from Mobile Tweete

24. Hmmmm. . . . how much did I care about that episode. . . . about 70%. The last few minutes at least put a spin on the MEM falling apart. about 13 hours ago from Mobile Tweete

25. 24 Hours of TNA programming to catch up on. . . . . . I have 90 hours to watch it in. . . . . 37 minutes ago from Mobile Tweete

26. Just started watching Against All Odds.... moments ago via not Twitter

For the time being

Check out my twitter page until I can get it to ship to here.

http://twitter.com/DiaboliksTNR

You know what would be great?

If Loudtwitter would do what I set it up to do. I have a bunch of Twitter messages that should have been shipped over to this blog and they weren't.....hopefully I can get this resolved soon.

What did Diabolik do today?

• 02:58 The Allex Shelly vs Chris Sabin match at TNAs Genesis is fucking amazing.....

--
DIABOLIK

Automatically shipped by LoudTwitter

What did Diabolik do today?

23:30 Al Snow in TNA? Interesting....

22:15 Just finished the November 27 2008 TNA Impact. The last 5 minutes made the show worth watching....

Diabolik's TNA Wrestling Catch-Up Turning Point 2008

Yeah so the PPV starts out with the cut down version of the montage recapping the Respect issues....the MEM come out of a limo and everyone walks past JB...except Steiner who decides to talk...dear god...at least he is 85% understandable....

So there is a X-Division ranking match....I just wonder if they are actually going to stick with it and use the rankings rather than just give shots to whomever might want a shot....I always thought that was the best approach...give someone a shot at a title, if they lose they move to the bottom....if they win the former champ gets a rematch and then the loser of that moves to the bottom....now the irony is that the Motor City Machine Guns are not in the match because they have a Tag Team Title Shot....but they really should be unless they are not doing singles stuff anymore...I love the fact that Eric Young beat Jay Lethal to take the top spot in the X-Division and get a title shot...he really showcased a lot of ability in this match...not a bad promo from Eric Young....when he is serious it can be intense...though I like him more jovial....

It's funny that they would have the Motor City Machine Guns disrespect Mick Foley by telling him they don't care about his accomplishments....are we getting another factions splitting from the New Blood...I mean TNA Originals?

So the end result of this whole rigamaroll is that The Main Event Mafia won every match...shocker.....

Whatever...silliness....there you go....

Diabolik's TNA Wrestling Catch-Up 10/30/08 & 11/06/08

So I am not going to go point for point...it takes too long and I am trying to catch up, not slow myself down....and ironically there wouldn't be much to write about....

October 30, 2008

So Joe and Styles call for people to side with them....a group of people come down....MEM calls out for a war....and they have their own music like i thought they would after a week....they allude to the fact that there may be a 5th member to their NWO club....and it turns out to be Scott Steiner....

November 6 2008

The are calling Steiner the Hit Man for the MEM.....I so want Brett to come out and destroy him.....Steiner and Nash "Too Sweet" in the ring....Christ Steiner still can't cut a damn promo to save his life....Why are people cheering him when he is talking????He talks about curtain jerkers...but he is currently the curtain jerker since there was no one on the show yet....retard....Joe finally comes out and tells him that if they had been able to understand Steiner that they might have been offended....Joe lists the innovative things that TNA has done....he calls out the newest recruit to the war...Christian (which is ironic since I know that he is in WWE now)....I love (or hate) how Booker drops in and out of the damn accent....

I like the little montage talking about the MEM vs Originals....though it seems as if that was shot and should have aired before the announcement of MEM so it could allow for some foreboding on the situation...

Why does Angle need to keep threatening Jarrett's family? It is silly....attack his pride...not his family....

A TNA video with Disturbed....did I know there was a Disturbed album? I think I have it as the song sounds familiar....have to check the mp3 player....all I have to say is that TNA's post production ability is really good....

Despite my previous bitching about the creation of MEM I must say that despite the win in the 6 man tag match, they put the young guys over really well....which is what good heels do....so despite the fact I don't like the idea of another NWO, I think if they are willing to put the young guys over we will see some good wrestling...

Of course I wrote all of that before Samoa Joe and Scott Steiner got in the ring and I want to shove pencils in my eyes...wow if that wasn't an NWO clusterfuck finish, I don't know what is....

Well it is almost 4am here so I am going to post this and start back up with Turning Point tomorrow probably...I think there are 28 shows left to warch, not including this weeks Impact....So much wrestling....

Diabolik's (and Rich's) TNA Catch-Up for October 23, 2008

Diabolik: Well, in my normal vein of trying to catch up on TNA Wrestling (if you hadn't noticed by the deluge of posts on both Perfect Impact and on Diabolik's Total Nonsense and Ridiculousness) I was surprised by Rich showing up at my home this morning to hang out. So we decided to let Rich in on the things he has been missing and do a little back and forth blogging about the October 23, 2008 show.

So how goes it Rich?

Richard: It's goin...been a while since I've actually watching any TNA programing, and I'm interested to see what I've missed. Work, life in general and a great deal of other things have kept me away. But with the new Lockdown coming up, and the fact that we'll be there for it, I'm kinda hyped! Looks like we're ready to go here, we've got the first TNA in HD set up in front of us, and it looks like it might be a big one. It's in Las Vegas, and although it happened a while ago, looks like it may have been shot and shown live, so that's cool. Haven't had one of those since the two hour special, or so I've just been told. I'm also a sucker for HD, so I'll be looking forward to catching that on my TV after the catch-up, and of course if I have Spike HD on my FiOS box. Guess now all that's left is to hit play!


Diabolik: The Beautiful People...Wooo....can I sound more apathetic?
I'm sure they were the center of attention in Las Vegas....they look kind of like hookers....

Richard: Didn't know Kip was involved with this...even though I read his name in the catch-up. Wow, what's up with that? Yeah...they do kinda look like that.

Diabolik: Oh...so you just didn't get that Mr. Ass was a part of The Beautiful People now?
Yeah
Hoooray for that!
Sarcasm!

Richard: Is there a story that makes this any less weird?

Diabolik: No....but now they are using paper bags with Kip's face on them......on women.....
So Velvet Sky vs Christie Hemme.....

Richard: (sighs)
Diabolik: exactly.....

Diabolik: So Angle apparently called JB at Midnight the morning of the show and told him that he was going to one up Foley's announcement and that his announcement is going to change the face of wrestling as we know it.....go figure
Christie wins with the Flying Firecrotch Guillotine....
(sigh)

Richard: I am confused at the name of .... oh....that's.....wow

Diabolik: We were considering talking more about Christie's win...but I decided I didn't care....

Richard: One might thought they would have had a regular X-Division match to kick this HD episode off...you know, some eye-popping, high flying action...but you know...that's just me.

Diabolik: Well, Flying Firecrotches in HD wasn't enough of an eye catching event?
JB is sitting down with Angle and he says that he made some calls to important people

Richard: Lol, if those eyes want to catch vd maybe...

Diabolik: LOL

Richard: What's Booker's problem? He needs speech therapy.

Diabolik: Booker is in the same room as JB and Angle.....and he says he is from Africa......and yet also from Houston Texas.....
Nash is there too......at least I can understand Nash.....Booker keeps repeating RESPECT in his retarded accent....

Richard: Apparently, Nash doesn't get any....respect...sorry had to d it

Diabolik: Yay! We are getting another New Blood angle.....like we did in WCW.....which worked so well then.....

Richard: I don't remember the outcome, what happened that time?

Diabolik: Hmmm...let's see....Eric Bischoff tried to ban together all of the newer talent against the veterans to take over control of the company to shape it in a new way....but it was all new guys vs established guys.....

Richard: So, i'm assuming people didn't like that...

Diabolik: I didn't like that and I don't think that it was very well taken by the fans....this is also a little before they went out of business.....

Richard: RESSSSPPEEEEEEEEEECCCCCT!

Diabolik: So a faction of Booker, Angle, Nash and Sting?????
Damn it....
Are they going to be Team RESPECT?

Richard: ...I see, not a way to take things now....
God I hope not

Diabolik: THE MAIN EVENT MAFIA?!?!?!?!?!?!?
WHAT THE GOD DAMN FUCK?!?!?!!?
Dear God....
I quit

Richard: Wait, I heard Colin talking about that...he was all weird about it and didn't want to tell me things...

Diabolik: Yeah someone else pointed out the MEM angle but they wouldn't tell me anything else because I didn't want to know.....

Diabolik: Why does our African friend still come out to the Harlem Heat esque music and not some African themed music?

Richard: Don't know..why is he still from Houston?..and...Really, the pinky is back?

Diabolik: What the fuck is he saying? I can barely understand him

Richard: Dunno..."no more accents" just got chanted

Diabolik: What the hell....a new belt was in the suitcase?
The TNA Legends Championship.....
So is this like the FTW World Championship?
Ah thank you Christian for coming down and interrupting him....

Richard: "Double C!!!" ... and that belt looks kinda cool, but I would say have it a bit darker red...

Diabolik: or not exist at all

Richard: Indeed.

Diabolik: So we already have NWO esque invites to the Main Event Mafia to Christian......
who isn't interested.....
and Christian wants Booker to put up the Legends Title at Turning Point.....

Richard: ...it looks like Booker likes this too...

Diabolik: yeah sure....of course he does because for whatever reason having Christian....who doesn't want to join the group.....join the group makes them better.....like he wouldn't try to fuck it up from the inside anyway.....

Diabolik: Lauren is talking to Matt Morgan and Abyss about the Tag Team Text match (which when she first said it I was trying to figure out if you won by texting faster than the other people)

Richard: lol...It's good to see Double J back on the show, well, for me not having seen this is so long anyway.

Diabolik: JB is up with Jeff Jarrett talking about how Jarrett won't wrestle Angle again....

Richard: The Middle Eastern Nightmare, or "Divari", looks pretty jacked

Diabolik: X-Division title match with Bashir vs Jay Lethal.....
He does.....

Richard: Are you F'ing serious!!! That short?

Diabolik: ?????
Did I just blink and miss that match?
Lethal misses a fucking elbow off the top rope, Bashir comes over and DDTs him and that is the match?
there was like 4 wrestling moves.....
damn it.....it was for a damn title

Richard: I'm calling somebody was hurt before this match.

Diabolik: Let's see.....(rewinding the recording)

Diabolik: I don't see it.....could be...I just don't see it......(still reviewing the tape)

Diabolik: That whole match from bell to bell was 1:50.....
slowly becoming WWE.....

Richard: If that was planned, I just don't see how that highlights one of, if not THE best part of TNA.

Diabolik: Unless they were running long.....

Richard: It's the X division that got me into TNA in the first plac

Diabolik: i know....
but if they were running long why cut the best part of the company? Cut the interviews.....

Richard: Agreed.

Diabolik: Lauren talks with AJ Styles and Samoa Joe about the MEM (God I will hate writing that) and how that will affect the match of Styles/Joe vs Booker/Nash.....

Diabolik: Joe goes off about how he is going to hurt any of the MEM if they get in his way.....

Diabolik: So Rhino is all up in Bashir's face.....accepts his challenge and says he will deport him.....when did Rhino become an INS agent (that and the fact that he is a legal US citizen)
Richard: Isn't anyplace, also anywhere Rhino?

Diabolik: Bashir kicks him in the balls and beats on him.....

Diabolik: So the Hardcore Tag Team Gauntlet Match is next.....Beer Money Inc and Team 3D start it off......they are telling people to text in with what weapon should be legal in this match.....Ladder, Table or Chairs......IN A FUCKING HARDCORE MATCH

Richard: Can I text to have you guys stop doing his?

Diabolik: I wish.....if only we had watched this 6 months ago.....

Richard: Indeed.

Diabolik: Oh, So it was actually Roode and Brother Ray that started out and the next person in was James Storm.....
I missed the fact that it was a singles elimination match that will turn into a tag team match some how.....
Next in is D-Von......
Next in is Hernandez...

Richard: "Super Mex?"
Well, he is pretty ridiculous...

Diabolik: They have been calling him that because he jumps over the top rope every match.....
Next in is Homicide

Richard: ahhh, gotcha. Gotta tell you though, we're what, halfway in and now FINALLY seeing some good stuff?
matt morgan looks like he bathed himself in oil

Diabolik: He did.
Morgan comes down and eliminates Homicide and D-Von and Hernandez....
Morgan gets eliminated because he was trying to tell Abyss not to come to the ring.....
Tables are legal in a hardcore match.....
Yay!
shocker

Richard: Of course they are... and of course 3D likes this

Diabolik: Will I get a flaming table?!?!?

Richard: In HD?

Diabolik: Charcoal lighter fluid
ECDub chants

Richard: It's going on!
Diabolik: Team 3D left their lighter at home.... and lighters flying into the ring
This time they are letting the lighter fluid evaporate
So Abyss gets eliminated.....
I am so confused as to the rules for this match
and now it is Beer Money and 3D
and a We Want Fire chant
oh, what a waste of lighter fluid
they broke the table without lighting it
Beer Money Inc wins

Richard: No revenge for Abyss...I'm sad...and it looks like no fire...and a cheap end.

Richard: Does Kurt's entrance video tag him as the "Greatest Wrestler in the World"?

Diabolik: That is totally not true that the Angle from the previous week was unlike any we had ever seen......we saw him flip out in the WWE
and yes it does.....they tagged him that when he debuted

Richard: I suppose it would have been true...in 1996...Don't get me wrong, i like the dude, but, um...yeah

Diabolik: yeah well.....what can I say.....
Angle says once again that he is going to go to Jarrett's house to talk to his kids......
Jarrett shows up and says that they have the finest talent in the world and he has no business being in the ring......
which could be true.....

Richard: He names all the talent that should matter as well, if something goes down, Double J could be the one vet that stands with the "Young Guys" or whatever they may wind up being called.

Diabolik: Abyss is standing in the ring behind Angle....they go at it....Blackhole Slam attempt and Angle gets out....

Richard is offline. Messages you send will be delivered when Richard comes online.

So Rich had to leave before we could finish watching the show. So now you get just the Diabolik rant.....

Kong and Saieed are in the back bitching at Lauren...they are sick and tired of taylor Wilde....I still think this is a different person behind the veil....very americanish accent on the accent....too much emphasis on the rolling r's....

JB is with Taylor Wilde....I hate her hair....Taylor says that Kong has to end her career in order to take the title from her....Ooooooooooo....

Kong is on the way to the ring....Whoopee!...Cut to a commercial and then Taylor

Wilde comes out....Whoopee!....Yeah I am so totally stoked for this match....A chant for Lets go Taylow Lets go Kong.....interesting...the crowd is really into this....Kong wins the title with an Awesome Bomb....


...Dear god...more Main Event Mafia....Sting and Nash come to the ring for the Main Event....they come out to Sting's music.....Samoa Joe comes down....Then AJ Styles....I wonder how Nash feels about needing to enter with Sting's music....at least the MEM doesn't have entrance music yet....I give it a week....

AJ squares off against Nash which is a great juxtaposition of sizes....Nash ends up smashing Joe with the Title belt and pins him for the win...and then they play his music....I guess it didn't matter that he didn't have his music while coming down....Aj starts fighting off both Nash and Sting and then Jow stands up and puts Nash in a choke....Booker comes down and hits Style with the Legends belt....

We get Foley after that....

Foley is talking about how he made a lot of money and Jarrett told him he should make an investment....then the MEM comes out to interrupt....Ironically they had just been out....Angle starts talking shit to Foley....about Foley saying Kurt was shit....Angle headbutts Foley....Now Foley is a major shareholder in TNA....Ooooo....cause I didn't see that coming....though I thought they were going to make him a commissioner for the gimmick.....Foley tries to imitate Vinny Mac in the "You're Fired" voice by telling Angle that he is fried etc.....Foley wants to know if Angle wants to be a part of history or be history.....

So yeah....I'm not sure if Foley's Announcement really "crossed the line" or not.....but whatever...he is a part of TNA now and we will see what that brings....


So wow....a TNA Live event on tv and that is what we got? An NWO esque respect posse? A new title, because we never see enough fucking titles on a show....and no fire....I think Mick wept a little from seeing all that lighter fluid go to waste....

I have no idea how many more shows I have to get through before April 19.....and our apologies for Rich not being able to ramble back and forth with me....something about him needing to pick up his wife from work....

Diabolik's Wrestlemania 25 Review

I know Rich posted some stuff before I could, since I had no internet connection where I was. I would have liked to watch it with Rich but it didn't happen.

Now the last bit of WWE programming that I watched was the Raw after Wrestlemania 24, when Ric Flair was walking down to the ring to give his goodbyes when I got a call from my girlfriend at the time and I pressed record on my tv tuner and it got all messed up. Now I could have watched following weeks, but the motivation wasn't there for me....at some point I was like 4 months out of watching WWE and I wasn't missing anything. So I made the vow to m=not watch, read or hear anything about WWE programming until Wrestlemania. Hell I even skipped my favorite PPV of the year because of the vow....So I sat down and watched the show...and I took notes....

The show is in Houston TX....home of Booker T....except when he is from Africa....I don't understand why they didn't do this show at MSG....whatever....They also keep calling it the 25th Anniversary of Wrestlemania....but it isn't. If the first Wrestlemania was in 1985 and it is 2009....well if you can do basic math it is apparent. As a friend stated, Wrestlemania 2 was the first anniversary for Wrestlemania...therefore this has to be the 24th Anniversay. It's kind of like the Millennium issues people had....but anyway....

So the first match of the night is the Money in the Bank match. I know Wrestlemania usually starts out with this match and I fugred it was a decent way to get me back into the WWE style without bogging me down in storyline that I didn't know about...We had CM Punk, Mark Henry (WHY?!?!?!?!? If he were to climb the ladder it might break through the canvas), MVP (who is the US Champ, so there is no US Championship match tonight I guess), Finlay, Shelton Benjamin, Kofi Kingston (he is new to me) Kane and .....CHRISTIAN (who I had heard had left TNA, but since I haven't gotten to that point in the TNA timeline I was trying not to learn too much about it)...

Kofi is impressive. He is fast and agile, he jumped clear over a ladder being run at him and did some other athletic things....almost a shame he isn;t in the X-Division...Shelton takes a dive off a ladder and almost lands on his head....Kofi ran up an almost straight vertical ladder....Christian tries to Unprettier CM Punk from a ladder and fucks it up....and CM Punk is the winner again....

Next we get Kid Rock....who performs for over 10 minutes for no good reason....ok, they wanted to use his stripper anthem song for the Divas Battle Royale, but 10 minutes?...He could have at least done American Badass as a little props to The Undertaker....So 25 Divas in the ring...cluster fuck abounds....Santina Morella, Santino's twin sister from italy, wins the title of Ms. Wrestlemania...Santino in drag and getting a better paycheck than most people...go figure....I would almost watch WWE again just to see the outcome of that...like Santino walking down the hallway and then has to change into Santina...little things like that....

We get a little montage of Jericho calling out Mickey Rourke about his role in The Wrestler....I hear that there was consideration of the two of them facing off at Wrestlemania until there were Oscar nominations and Rourke's PR team shut it down....but this back and forth leads us to Jericho disrespecting the Legends (sound familiar???) of Ric FLair, Superfly Jimmy Snuka, Roddy Piper, and Ricky The Dragon Steamboat....Which leads us to the Legends elimination match....Piper and Snuka sucked...I know Piper was fighting cancer...but if you are going to be wrestling, the least he could have done was train a little...at least he didn't take off his shirt...Steamboat stole the match though....he was in great shape, threw his arm drags perfectly, and made the match worth watching...even though he lost....after Flair gets in the ring and eventually gets hit with the Codebreaker, Mickey Rourke gets called out and gets in the ring and knocks Jericho for a loop, being as he used to be a Golden Gloves boxer....

Next up we have Jeff Hardy vs Matt Hardy....apparently Jeff won the WWE title and Matt won the ECW title...Matt was jealous....and in real life Jeff Hardy had a house fire that claimed the life of his dog and a bunch of personal effects....well the WWE spun that tragedy unto a storyline where Matt Hardy was attacking Jeff secretly and Jeff eventually confronts Matt...leading to this Extreme Rules match...crazy spot after crazy spot....Jeff takes a Twist of Fate with a chair wrapped around his head to give Matt the win....

Orton is pacing in the back with Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase Jr....

JBL comes to the ring as the Intercontinental Champ.....runs his mouth about Texas and a bunch of random crap....Rey Mysterio comes out dressed as The Joker....JBL kicks Mysterio in the face before the bell is rung....once the bell is rung Mysterio kicks his, sets him up for the 619 (stupid name for that move) amd wins...it took all of like 20 seconds.....JBL quits and walks out...

Next up is Shawn Michaels vs The Undertaker....the montage for this is great...it showcases a lot of what was going on between the two of them....Shawn dressed up as The Undertaker only in white instead of black.....even in the entrances, Shawn is shown dressed in white descending from above where Taker comes up from below the stage.....This was the match of the night....hands down....even with the couple of blown spots it was really solid....in the end Michaels kicks out of the Choke Clam, the Last Ride, and a Tombstone....Taker kicks out of the Sweet Chin Music....at the end Michaels goes up for a Moonsault and Taker catches him and turns it into a Tombstone for the win....

Then we got the World Heavyweight Title match with Edge as champ vs Big Show and John Cena.....Cena's entrance is marked with a huge number f guys dressed as Cena lining up along the entrance ramp and doing the You can't see me wave while Cena runs down to the ring....Cena ends up winning the match by FUing (they call it the Attitude Adjustment or something like that now) Big Show and then Edge on top of Show....Gee...Cena is the World Heavyweight Champ...Whoop dee doo....

We then are treated to the WWE Hall of Fame inductees, with the Funks, Steamboat and the Von Erichs being inducted, along with Stone Cold....who comes out in a tux...walks away to the back and comes back with an ATV and rides around the ring...drinks some beer...has a brew with JR...then leaves....

And last but not least (or maybe it was least) we have the WWE title match with Triple H vs Randy Orton....apparently they let it out that Trips and Stephanie were actually married and Orton ends up attacking The McMahons including Steph....the storyline for this looked really good....unfortunately the match wasn't that good....it basically was Trips squashing Orton...even though Orton got some good hits and moves in....Trips retains the title after hitting Orton with a sledgehammer....

All in all...I wish that WWE would put the storyline bits of the shows on the web so I could skip the shitty wrestling and maybe still be interested in the stories...I mean the Matt and Jeff Hardy thing and the Taker Michaels stuff would have been cool to see as a build up....but I can't take 5 hours to watch the shitty wrestling....

So there you have it....looks like another year of not watching WWE.....